While I was in college I was pursued by a man who used abuse to control me.
I had broken up with him but felt remorse so I went over to his apartment in the evening.
He had been drinking.
He said I was just a tease because I was still a virgin but yet very desirable.
Then he pulled a gun out and threatened to either rape me or kill me.
The swat team prevented him from doing either.
Thank God for them and the neighbor lady who called them when she heard me screaming.
What made me think that a man who could do such evil would be someone capable of love?
The answer lies in my childhood. I learned as a child to accept emotional and psychological abuse through verbal attacks because my mother had chosen to be bitter and unforgiving.
Because the emotional and psychological abuse from childhood had forged a path in my soul that indicated I was not good enough for a man who respected and loved me.
In the Bible it says that you should train a child up in the way they should go.
To yell at a child and say cruel things to them is to forge a path down the avenue of abuse. Is that really what we want for our children?
An abusive childhood is a very difficult ditch to crawl out of as an adult.
God does not seek for women to be subjected to abuse. God is such a tender and loving Father and one who cherishes His daughters.
In the Bible the Lord says that we are to be in submission to our husbands.
Does that mean we are to submit to abuse?
No, for in Colossians 3:19 the Lord commands husbands “to love their wives and never treat them harshly.”
Abuse is harsh.
We as women are to be loved in the same measure as Christ loved the church, giving His dear life for our sins.
If a man loves a woman to the extent that Christ loved the church submission is a privilege, not an obligation.
It is important for us to teach our daughters to seek men who love them in this way.
This is the only way the generational curse of abuse can be broken.
I believe that my sweet and beautiful daughter has chosen a man who adores her and she has no problem submitting to his wishes.
They are such a beautiful and compassionate couple and I hope that through them the generational curse of psychological, emotional, verbal and physical abuse has been broken from my blood line.
If that has indeed happened then that is the greatest gift I will have given to my future grandchildren.